My Reflections On 9-11. What Did I Learn From It?

Every year, for the last 13 years, I have had to take some time to process what happened on that fateful day in 2001. This year is no different. I spoke at a school this morning to the 9-12^th graders and shared my story. Some of them weren’t even born yet when all this happened OR they were very, very little so they have no clue the effects it had on those of us who were old enough to remember.

The good thing about time getting us farther and farther away from that event is that for some reason, this year, I am not AS emotional as I have been in the past. In fact, until the 10^th anniversary, I would get depressed and moody in the weeks leading up to that date. On that date, I would feel heaviness all day and would be glad the day was over. This time it was different…don’t know if all the craziness of life has kept me distracted or I am healing. I hope it is the latter. I think it is. This year, I talked more about “what I learned from 9-11” instead of focusing on the actual events.  That made a difference too, as I prepared. 

I would like to share 3 things that came out of my experience in not only living in NYC but  ministering for several years especially that first year of constant service. I feel that the Lord wants me to share it with you, the reader, so take it for what you need to. The first 2 points are pointed at Christians especially and the last is for those who may not have asked Jesus to be the boss of your life. 

Here goes: 

Everyone is watching.  I am not talking about being paranoid that people are “watching you”. I am talking about people watching how you handle life. As I met with family members of those who died, they told me this. In their last moments, their loved one was the one that people came to when they all knew they were going to die. One particular man, Al Braca, led some to the Lord as well as offered assurance to those who were believers. Because of how he lived, in those pertinent moments, when they all knew they would not make it out, he was able to bring comfort and salvation to those who “watched” him all those years. As a follower of Christ, I am to LIVE to display Christ in my life, every day. Colossians 4:5 says this:  “Live wisely among those who are not believers, and make the most of every opportunity”. Colossians 4:5 

If I honor the Lord, He will be glorified in my death. Revelation 2:10 says this: Be faithful to me, even if it means death, and I will give you life as your prize of victory.  A young woman of about 26 had over 1000 people at her funeral. She had died instantly as her office took a direct hit. When they went to celebrate her life, many came to honor her and found that the family chose to honor Christ through her life. Several people that day and in the months ahead came to know the Lord because of the “way” she had lived in her life. All that she did honored the Lord. She has eternal “life” and those who knew got introduced through the way she lived. 

 Never take for granted that I will be alive tomorrow.   Today is the only day you and I have guaranteed. NON FOLLOWERS: Are you ready to meet the Lord? Have you asked the Lord to be the boss of your life? Today is the day! We really AREN’T guaranteed tomorrow. James 4:14 “Come now, you who say, "Today or tomorrow we will go to such and such a city, and spend a year there and engage in business and make a profit." Yet you do not know what your life will be like tomorrow. You are just a vapor that appears for a little while and then vanishes away. Instead, you ought to say, "If the Lord wills, we will live and also do this or that."… 

What happened on 9-11 was VERY, VERY BAD!!! God is VERY, VERY good!! He is a DEPENDABLE GOD. He really is. Trust Him. Draw near to Him. Let Him in your life today. I PROMISE, in the 41 years I have been a follower of Christ, I have never been alone, never been disappointed and saw that God KEEPS his promises, unlike humans. He loves me and you and the WORLD and He wants us, He longs for us, His creation, to be drawn to Him. Maybe you have had a “9-11” and you blame God…that’s okay. He still loves you and hasn’t gone anywhere. Maybe you are turned off by what you may call “hypocrites” in the church…guess what, we are ALL hypocrites in some form or fashion because we are imperfect. Don’t look to others for your relationship with God….look to GOD…to Jesus…HE created you and He is big enough to handle whatever you throw His way. He simply loves you and desires HIS creation to be close to him. 

God was present on 9-11. He gave us free will but He still shows up. He has better plans for us than we know ourselves. He is in control and in the end, He wins. He didn't MAKE the people die that day, people did. Some very sick people who thought they could control others tried but did not win in the end.

Today is the day!! If you don’t know what to say….just tell HIM your heart. Ask Him to be the boss of your life admitting you don’t want to be the god of your own life. He hears your heart. Then, when you are done with that conversation, go have one with someone you trust who is a believer in Christ.  Tell them what happened to you.  

Reflect on this....

Where Was God on 9-11?

Being hungry for God...........

The other day, I spent the afternoon with a young woman who is a young believer in Christ. She had become a Christian at an early age and clung to Jesus for protection as she weathered abuse and neglect from family members. She had prayed for the Lord to guide her in areas of her life. She said each time there was a hard moment, she prayed and God answered her in a dream. She shared a particular dream with me and I asked her....did you know that was in the Bible? She did not. I opened scripture and showed her and she lit up! It confirmed what she had heard in the dream. She is being discipled now and is so hungry to know the Word of God.

It caused me to reflect on how excited we ALL should be to hunger for God's Word no matter how long we have been followers/believers in Christ. I know that after that wonderful time with her, I felt even more excited to go home and study Gods Word....looking for the wonderful morsels of truth to feed my soul. What about you today? Do you HUNGER for God? Do you "eat" His word up? There are a lot of wonderful things for you and me in the Bible......what about today? As you are reading this post, go read the Bible this afternoon or evening and fill yourself up...........

Psalm 107:9 says this:
                       "For he satisfies the thirsty and fill the hungry with good things.

 

Love Your Neighbor

So much has happened over the last months worldwide. I am weary. Are you?  Media has bombarded us with images of war, poverty, disease, death, conflict among our own and I am just tired. I am taking a media break this weekend to get some perspective and pray. I think that that is our only solution for our world....to pray and then to act in faith when necessary.

 I have two things I want to leave you with today. This post is short and to the point. 

 

CS Lewis said this:  "Next to the Blessed Sacrament itself, your neighbor is the holiest object presented to your senses.”  from his book, The Weight of Glory

The Bible says this: 1 Corinthians 10:24 "Let no one seek his own good, but that of his neighbor".

Go love your neighbor today. We are all weary and tired from weeks of bad news......share some love and give God the glory! It works best that way! 

Lessons Learned from a World Trade Center Victim/Victor After 9-11

Jennifer Wong.....does this name mean anything to you?  It does to me. I never met her though. I heard about her and met her family as I was writing a book called "As the Towers Fell, Stories of Unshakeable Faith on 9-11"(2003).  She died the morning of September 11th at the age of 26. The plane was a direct hit so she most likely died instantly. 

I recently got to speak to a group of graduating seniors(my boys class).  I decided to use what I knew of Jennifer's story to encourage them as they think about how significant their life could be. It was short(short attention span)and I certainly couldn't go into all the details of her life that I knew but here are 3 things I have learned from her and thought I would share with everyone who reads this.....

A little background: Jennifer was an Asian American, a follower of Christ and daughter to very strong Christian parents. According to her family and friends, Jen was full of life and loved the Lord deeply. In fact, over 1000 people showed up at her memorial service in honor of who she had been to them and others......this is what I shared with the graduating seniors.

Lessons Learned from Jennifer Wong

1. Make God your top desire.  No matter what you do in life, Christ needs to be #1. If you don't have a relationship with Christ, you need to decide if you are going to follow HIM or not. For those who are followers of Christ, it is important that you hunger and thirst for God every day. That seemed to be a significant part of who Jennifer was according to her diaries, her family and friends. No other desire can fulfill you except the desire to know God. In the Bible, it says very clearly what will happen IF you fully trust Him.

Psalm 37 says: 

3 Trust in the Lord and do good.
    Then you will live safely in the land and prosper.
⁴ Take delight in the Lord,
    and he will give you your heart’s desires.

⁵ Commit everything you do to the Lord.
    Trust him, and he will help you.
⁶ He will make your innocence radiate like the dawn,
    and the justice of your cause will shine like the noonday sun.

2. Make others a priority in your life. Jen made an intentional decision to think about others instead of herself. She loved them and they were drawn to God because of her. In fact, because of the way she lived, there were those who came to Christ AFTER she died as they watched her family deal with the tragedy and remembered how Jennifer treated them.  She seemed to have a lot going for her on the outside" looks, friendliness, great job, good family......she could have become very involved in herself and only things that concerned her and what she wanted but she chose Christ instead.  Don't get me wrong, she enjoyed life but she knew her SOURCE and she followed Christ command to love others. She got out of her self and thought about others. It showed by the response at her memorial service.

Jesus said it over and over again:  Love God, Love Others. 

 3.  Whatever you do in your careers, do for God and not for yourself. Doing "this life" for God is much more fruitful than just for yourselves. It seemed that Jennifer's desires were to live for God and through her job, her career, her home life and her relationships, all were there to glorify God.

What about you?  

Colossians 3:23 says this: ^"Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters". 

Jennifer was young and vivacious, she seemed to have life going for her and in moments, her life was taken away. She did not anticipate going to work that morning to die. She said goodbye to her sister at the subway never to be seen again.

Wonder what you and I would be doing differently if we thought we would die this afternoon? Or tomorrow? Would your life make such a difference? Every life is important to God and as followers of Christ, we can make a difference in this world. EVEN AFTER Jennifer's death, she keeps making a difference. The very fact that we are right here, 13 years later, talking about how she lived is proof that God can take any of us, no matter what we have done in the past and make a difference in this world! 

My challenge to you today.........let your life be God's,not your own as you travel through the next years. What you decide today on how to live WILL make a difference in others tomorrow.  

To God be the Glory for Jennifer's Life......may we all make our life count so that others will see Christ in us.....................

What I am learning from Son#2

When we met S, he was this gangly little boy in J's 5th grade class who needed a mom and dad and we prayed about it and it seemed that we were to move forward and have him become a member of our family. We felt it was the right thing and so we moved forward. Little did we know what God would use this boy for over the last 6 years and a lot of it would be painful but stretching. This one was the one God used to MOVE US OUT of our comfort zone and MADE us depend on the Lord more than we EVER had. Is that a bad thing? Nope!  It hurt at the time but hindsight is 20/20 and so this is what I have seen God do in my life through Son#2.

1. God MADE me depend on HIM and no one else. Because of S's reactions to his circumstances, I was put in a position at times where the professionals and the friends and family just didn't have any answers to what was going on with him and so I was FORCED to depend on the Lord. The verse that comes to mind in this area is one of my favorites.

Isaiah 30:20-21

 Though the Lord gave you adversity for food
    and suffering for drink,
he will still be with you to teach you.
    You will see your teacher with your own eyes.
²¹ Your own ears will hear him.
    Right behind you a voice will say,
“This is the way you should go,”
    whether to the right or to the left.

He stayed true to his word. God taught me to suffer the right way(sometimes I goofed big time but you get the point)and depend on Him. 

2.   S knows how to think through things. Yes, sometimes it has been for evil and not for good(haha) but he really can think through things and write out all the good and bad of every decision. When he is focused, he can tell me the pros and cons of his decisions. I need to do more of that.

3. S taught me about love. I have had to learn to love someone in my home who isn't always "lovely" to be around. S has some issues and though some are not his own doing, some are. I have seen that true LOVE comes when you can love someone through the good, the bad and ugly. I have learned that when someone is hurting, you don't abandon them, you love them through it. AND, we never know what a person truly has been through, so we love anyway....I have learned that true love is sometimes TOUGH love.  I have learned to truly love someone through S. 

4. S really loves to learn. I have always loved to learn but he REALLY loves to learn. From learning to cook a new recipe to the latest and greatest in electronics, he wants to learn. He told me once that "even at my age" I could learn more and more!! He inspires me to keep learning.

5. Finally, S has taught me that most life problems stem from past trauma and that I need to have more empathy. I have learned that though I care about people, I have lots to learn about being empathetic. To empathized doesn't excuse, it understands. I have come to understand that our brains and our pasts so influence who we are right now.  I am learning to understand. 

  

I guess that all in all as I read through this post, LOVE is the theme of what S has taught me. I am amazed as I wrote, how much God has been teaching me about loving a person....sometimes when you can't stand their behavior, sometimes when they are very sick, sometimes when they are uncooperative, sometimes when they are just light and fun and smart! What more do I need from this precious young man than a lesson on LOVE....FAMILY LOVE....TRUE LOVE. 

 ^" Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud  or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out.  Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance". I Corinthians 13:4-7 


I have not arrived here yet, but this is what God is teaching me through this son of mine. Thank you S for being the vehicle in which God is refining me. I know HE is refining and healing you! I have faith that He will one day.....with these words...

"...But I will restore you to health and heal your wounds, declares the LORD..." Jeremiah 30:17

 

What I am learning from ...son #1

My #1 son is the best! As he gets ready to graduate, I have been reflecting on his growing up and who he has become. Here are just a few of the traits I admire in him.

JOY God sent him to us to bring laughter. He is just naturally funny. Yes, we laugh at him but not in the mean way...in the "he is so naturally funny and doesn't even try" way! I feel very blessed because in the midst of the chaos, he is usually there making some comment that sends hubby and me into a tailspin of laughter. He is our happy guy! He didn't used to be that way....but once he was stable in our home, grew in Christ and gotten through puberty(never want to go back there again)he has become a wonderful young man. He is always smiling. He jumps up out of bed each day ready to go into the day. He jumps in the car in the afternoon after school telling me "it was a good day" almost every day!! He keeps us accountable about going to church. Every Sunday, he bounces out of bed ready to get over to church no matter how we are feeling!! (hehe)  I SEE Phillipians 4:4 in him every morning. (Rejoice in the Lord always, again I say Rejoice!)  It is rare that he is depressed or down even though he struggles sometimes with depression. The Lord helps him to overcome it and he just bounces around through life!

One of the characteristics that I admire and want to emulate from him is FORGIVENESS. No matter how much I mess up as a mother or hubby messes up as a father, or how much someone might tease him or has bullied him in the past, he forgives. He REALLY forgives. He forgets too.(there is a blessing sometimes in having some short term memory loss). He just doesn't say it....he means it. He loves people the way God does and I wish I had that in me. He accepts ALL people the way they are. One example, he forgave his brother over and over again for some things S did to him. He just said, "he's my brother".

He is also BRAVE. He loves, loves, loves music, The other night at his prom, he was the only one dancing on the floor. The other students were snickering but you know what was really happening right? ......they didn't want anyone to see them be silly or mess up, J didn't care. He felt like dancing and he did...for over an hour!!! He just kept on. I watched him, I watched the others. He just didn't care what they thought...he just wanted to dance and he did!! He ended up getting the whole group of chaperones up there on the floor and we had a blast!I would have worried about those things.

 

J is also KIND. I have never known someone to be kind to so many people. He is always concerned about how you feel and he loves helping those in need. He once came home and asked me to gather some food so he could take to his volunteer day. He knew they were low and wanted to help. For a while, we took a lady we knew to church every week. J was always jumping out and helping her in with her things. He was deeply saddened that she died recently. He hurt because of the loss.

 

Someone once said that people with special needs are closer to God than the rest of us.....you know what, I am beginning to believe it. They are purer and have less filters which can clog us up as humans.  I see God-like qualities in J that I don't see much in myself or many others.  When he came to us, he didn't even know these great qualities were in the Bible....he just lived them. So, to our #1 son, I give you MAJOR KUDOS for being so forgiving, so kind, joyful and  brave! 

I cant wait to see what God does with the rests of your life! 

I want to be like you one day. Please keep teaching me how to be those things! 

Joshua 1:9

Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”

Generous Giving

Reposting from a Facebook page I write for each week.....this is a constant struggle for all of us as followers of Christ. What do you think? Is it hard to ask the Lord to show you what possessions you need to "give away"? It is for me but becoming easier and easier. We don't have much in our house that stays sedentary for long.It was hard at first.....but as Russ and I get closer to the Lord, it is getting easier because we are tied to our "things".

It had been a very cold week in Montgomery. I got a call from a friend who had a co-worker who needed a coat. I put the word out and very soon after got a call from a lady I know who said that just that morning she had prayed and asked the Lord to show her who to give this coat she had to. The coat was the exact size this other woman needed. The lady who needed the coat was thrilled. She didn't know how she was going to afford one.

The lady who had the coat was thrilled because it was a reminder of several things.
1. She had too many coats for one person. She needed to share what she had.
2. God answers when we ask and she was willing to be obedient to His prompting.
3. She was learning to consider ALL of her possessions God's property,not her own. So if someone else needed it, she was asking the Lord to help her be willing to give it up...for someone else.

Wonder what it would look like if, as followers of Christ, we took seriously the fact that everything good that has been given to us is from God and that we are called to "live generously" because of what He has done for us? Would you pray that prayer this week?

Are you willing to be "willing" to give up your possessions for those who need it more? The places we live would be DIFFERENT if we ALL were so obedient.

Praying this week for all followers of Christ to come to a point of radical generosity because of the great generosity the Lord has bestowed on us. 

                                                Matthew 10:8b MSG
                          "You have been treated generously, so live generously".

Are the Doors of Your Church REALLY Open to ALL Who Want to Come In?

Saw this from a friend of mine. Thought it was worth reposting.  So, where are you?  When someone "comes out", are you willing to let them come in? Food for thought. 

Katie's Post

Investment

Ever since I became a Christian I have been told that in order to help people KNOW God’s love, we must invest in their lives. we must DEMONSTRATE His love and not just talk the talk. I have found over the years that statement to be very true especially when my husband and I adopted our two boys. Oh, we were told that there was going to be an inordinate amount of investment with our traumatized children, but we did not fully understand until we experienced it.Their medical/mental challenges require that we show them not just talk about it. Our family journey has challenged us to SHOW God's love to EVERYONE, not just our boys. Investment is hard and messy sometimes but the benefits are tremendous.

What has that investment looked like for us?

*Thousands of hours of “redoing” school when they got home because they didn’t learn anything in class.  Classrooms are dens of anxiety for traumatized kids.

*Countless phone calls to every professional you can think of to get appointments for evaluations and medicines, testing, etc, etc.

*Explaining over and over to teachers WHY our boys acted the way they did and how to help them. Some never got it!

*Moving from a place we LOVED dearly so that our son could have less stress.

*Lots of holes in the walls, doors removed from bedrooms, bedrooms cleared of everything except the essentials, furniture broken, locks put on doors, finding hoarded food in odd places, things being broken, torn up, ripped apart and then repairing all those things!  

*Lots of mileage on cars going to specialists, therapy, hospitals, treatment centers.

*Hours lost from work for the above.

*Sleepless nights/lots of tears and crying out to God. 

*Watching very tall teens have tantrums like 3 year olds and feeling extremely helpless.

*Training and retraining sitters and caregivers on our boys  needs.

*People not always understanding why we have had to cancel at the last minute on engagements, etc. because our boys couldn’t handle the anxiety of crowds and literally fall apart because of that small change in their routines.

*Lots of criticisms on how we parent from outsiders.

*Reading tons of books on childhood trauma and all the diagnoses they have had put on them.
*Going to dozens of trainings on our boys diagnoses to be able to know how to parent them best. 

*Rethinking what “retirement” is going to look like for us.

*Realizing we are going to be very involved in parenting our kids the rest of our lives.

*Telling our story over and over again to professionals.

*Having the police visit our home on a regular basis.

*Having your identity stolen by your very own child.

*Learning how to file a police report/warrant on your own child.

*Visiting a jail for the first time to go see your son.

*Realizing that not everyone “gets” your family and feeling very lonely and isolated sometimes. 

*Being left out of things that you would normally be a part of because of not being able to find a sitter.

*Having neighbors jump to conclusions about your boys “behaviors” and accusing them of things that they did not do because they were “disabled” and being threatened with being shot. ( that is the topper-it really happened).

Now before you think I am complaining, let me clarify. I AM NOT COMPLAINING. This is reality, not exaggeration. This is the hard reality of being parents of kids who have not only been traumatized by abuse and neglect but who have medical issues as well. Kids who are having to start over and RELEARN everything they did not learn as small children. From the simplest task of tying shoelaces to learning to live in a "fairly healthy" family. 

We are entering a new season of parenting our special needs kids now…..the young adult phase. In the kid/teen phase we were fully involved in their lives. We had a say in all they did and all the docs and specialists and therapists did with them.   Soon…very soon, that will not be so clear. We are now in the phase of stepping back a bit and seeing what they can do with this thing called LIFE. It is hard to step back some. I am afraid they will be abused, mistreated, manipulated or worse….neglected. I have learned that I don’t have as much “trust” in the Lord as I thought I had. (I’m working on that)

So, investment is hard. It is messy. It can frustrate you. It can make you cry, make you mad and it can push you down…..but…HOPE steps in and makes its way into all those things listed above. HOPE draws us to a LIVING GOD who restores us and refreshes us.  HOPE gives us comfort and assurance when we don’t know what road to go down. Hope gives us more HOPE that HE is in control even on the darkest days. 

Here are just a FEW of the ways investment has paid off: 

The boys KNOW the Lord and trust Him more and more every day.
We have built a village to support us and pray for us. 

They know they have a "home" that is SAFE and comfort from the harsh realities of the world and can be "themselves" there.

They are doing better than we ever imagined in school. 

They have dreams that they did not have before. 

They have extended family and friends who love them even if they don't "get them". 

They can count on food to eat, warm clothes in the winter and a bed to sleep in. 

They have some friends now.

They have ALMOST stopped trying to bring their old habits into this family. 

They trust people more and more. 

They KNOW that even when they make bad choices, we will always be their parents and love them through the hard times.  
They have found some boundaries in their lives that they didn't learn as little children. 

We are NO saints as some have said. We are just followers of Christ who decided to trust the Lord and follow Him. We chose not to do it alone but gather a village. We prayed and God delivered all the “right” professionals we needed. He brought us to churches who ministered in various ways to our family to “lift us up”! He was with us..and still is….all the time! He helps us INVEST in others and REASSURES us that we don’t have to do this alone. He brought us HOPE.

Jesus always invested in people. He invested in the lives of 12 men and more as he journeyed through his calling from God. He called us to do the same. Matthew 25 shows this very clearly... “when you have done this to the least of these, you have done it to me” with a list of many things that call for investment.   

As Christians, we are called to INVEST. We are called to get messy in others lives and walk through life with them. Hubby and I are called to LOVE no matter what. We were called to love sacrificially. We are called to teach them, to help them practice what is right. We are called to set boundaries(yes that is LOVE).  Not every investment is as heavy OR long term as we have had with our boys(10 years this year). But every investment does require sacrifice and putting others needs above your own.

We feel hopeful for our boys. We are maturing in our faith. We are excited about what their future might hold while remembering that investing pays off! It is paying off right now…no matter what comes our way next! 

2 Corinthians 4:16-18  “So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen.  For the things that are seen are transient but the things that are unseen are eternal”.