Suffering

"Hear my prayer, O LORD! Listen to my cries for help! Don't ignore my tears".
Psalm 39:12

 

A lot of people are suffering deeply right now including our family.  Here is a very good blog post from a pastor friend who helps put things in perspective.  

Hope it encourages you....it did me! 

http://www.downshoredrift.com/downshoredrift/2012/10/what-do-we-mean-when-we-say-god-is-in-control.html

Fighting the Fear

"You have succeeded in life when all you really want is only what you really need."  Vernon Howard

I heard a speaker the other day talking about how one of the biggest stronghold's in his life was fear. I don't  think he is alone. I think we all struggle with it to some degree. I have struggled with it all of my life. It is pretty easy to see where mine started. My parents split up and my dad split. My mom raised 4 kids alone and though she made many mistakes, she was overall a good mother. She stuck with us and I have to say that I attribute that one thing to keeping me sane from all the fear I have had over the years.

BUT..she passed on fear to me..fear of not meeting bills, fear of being alone the rest of her life, fear of losing her job, fear and wondering of how she was going to provide for all of us. On top of her kids, her brother came to live with us. My uncle had a traumatic brain injury so he wasn't always dependable so she was always FEARFUL of provision. She was not a Christian. She didn't know any better.

Then, I met Jesus at age 12. Yes, ALL those fears were before the age of 12. I was a fear-centered child.

So.....after many years of being fearful, I laid down all those fears:
fear of being alone
fear of not being provided for
fear of not having things 
fear of being rejected by boys
fear of someone breaking into our house at night
fear of not having enough when crisis struck
fear of the unknown
fear of well...almost everything that had to do with  my well being! Really...very self centered. 


After 12, God of course, knew that was my stronghold but he gently, over the years, helped me with struggles. He helped me conquer a lot of fears by throwing me "out there" on my own during and after college so that I HAD to depend on Him for Provision. Boy did I struggle...because that fear turned into jealousy!

Jealous of what others had
Jealous of what I didn't have
Jealous of how it seemed things were so easy for others
Jealous that I had to work to pay my way through college
Jealous that the girls I was friends with kept getting the boys I wanted

I realized when I moved to NYC that those two strongholds were...well...very strong and had a a HUGE hold on my heart.  When I moved to NYC, I remember asking the Lord to take the fear and jealousy away. In fact, my boss and friend reminded me that I had "chosen" my lifestyle and that I had to either live with it or change it.(so many other things were going that year). What he was telling me that if I was going to live a simple life and not be cluttered with "things", then I needed to be content with it or change it. I CHOSE IT!

I chose a SIMPLE  missionary life
I chose to not go to seminary
I chose not to marry (I broke up with the guy I dated to go to NYC)this certain guy
I chose....
I chose....
I chose.....

 I CHOSE.....

Fear and Jealousy....I CHOSE. 

I had that epiphany. I CHOSE to live in FEAR and JEALOUSY!  No one forced me. God didn't take things away from me.. I CHOSE. 

So, I knew that IF I were to move on not only in life, but my spiritual growth, I had to let go of the FEAR and JEALOUSY that had become a familiar best friend. One that I could always count on to "step up" for me when I needed an excuse or blame for my thoughts and feelings.  I could always cry out and say "this is NOT fair!!"  and blame God or others or my circumstances.

WHEW....

So, in 1987 ish...I began the process of letting go of fear and jealousy! Over the years, I have seen the Lord move in mighty ways in my life. SO 25 years later in 2012 , though those thoughts CREEP back into my mind every so often, I see that they are becoming less and less and I TRUST more and more. I actually recognize the FEAR when it comes up and more than not, I put it to bed! RIGHT THEN!
 My two best friends now are TRUST and CONTENTMENT. I have learned and seen that GOD IS MY PROVIDER and I CAN TRUST HIM for my every need. I am CONTENT with the lifestyle we LIVE because our boys needs are MORE IMPORTANT than THINGS. I would rather spend my money on OTHERS than myself. Even if our boys didn't have these medical needs, our money would go to help others instead of helping ourselves.

I can HONESTLY say that. I AM CONTENT. I HAVE TRUST. 

FEAR and JEALOUSY keep knocking on the door of my heart, but I just have to say goodbye to them OVER AND OVER AGAIN until they leave. They are not coming around much anymore and I look forward to the day when the don't come AT ALL!

Hebrews 13:5
Let your character be free from the love of money, being content with what you have; for He Himself has said, "I will never desert you, nor will I ever forsake you,"

Recovering What Was Taken........

"David recovered what the Amalekites had taken from him...." I Samuel 30:18

       I went to hear Jim Cymbala last night. If you have been in hiding for the last 25 years or so, Jim is the pastor of the Brooklyn Tabernacle Church in New York and has written many books on the Christian church. He encourages Christians to remember that the Holy Spirit is in them and that we have God's power in us to overcome the things we are struggle with. I admire his teaching because he is simple and to the point. Last night was no different. I was at a banquet for Harvest Ministries in Opelika, AL. They minister to men and women who are in some form of bondage including addictions. There were several testimonies of healing in people's live, the residents did a great presentation of the Cardboard testimony and the challenge was great. TELL THE GOOD NEWS to those who are struggling and God can restore that which was taken. 

(See this example of a Cardboard testimony..very powerful. http://youtu.be/JnKkw5F8drc)

Anyway, these verses got me to thinking about how God loves us so much that as we come into a personal relationship with Him, He can RESTORE what has been taken from us. He restored David's family and livelihood from the robbers(the Amalekites). He restored many others in the Bible. So...........

                                  He can help us as well. 

 

 I think of our two boys. A LOT was taken from them when they were young...stable parents, healthy living, the right to have a childhood. Even though they did NOT have those things, they CAN be restored and that "life" is being restored through our family. 

I think about the fact that though I did not have a "father" growing up, I found my Heavenly Father at the age of 12 and He brought "many father like figures" to me throughout my life. 

He CAN bring back what has been taken from you. 

When I was in NYC at Graffiti Community Ministries, I knew  A LOT of people who had had their life taken from them from either bad choices they made OR that others made for them and when they invited Jesus into their heart, their lives began to be be restored to wholeness. Was it the same life as before? No! It was a BETTER life...

 Here in Montgomery, I have been working with a woman whose whole life(husband, possessions,etc)was taken away in a flash because of someone else's wrong choices. She is being restored. Is  it the same life as before? No! It is a BETTER life. 

If God can bring back to David, his family and all his possessions that had been stolen, he can bring back what was "taken" from you!  

           I wonder what has been "taken" from you today?

  

 Here are a few verses to encourage you. They bring me HOPE!

Joel 2:25-26 ESV  "I will restore to you the years that the swarming locust has eaten, the hopper, the destroyer, and the cutter, my great army, which I sent among you. “You shall eat in plenty and be satisfied, and praise the name of the Lord your God, who has dealt wondrously with you. And my people shall never again be put to shame".

John 10:10 ESV "The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly". 

Matthew 11:28 ESV "Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest".